A friend of mine had posted about feeling like she was failing at adulting after a family gathering because her family "all own houses and have steady work and have their shit together" while she is "unemployed and trying to figure [her] life out."
I wrote this post, but didn't want to comment directly on her status, because after several completely deleted drafts it turned into a long rant.
Here's that rant.
Figuring your life out is the most important thing you can do, but it doesn't happen all at once and it never ends once you do. Self evolves over time. Just be the best version of YOU that YOU can be every day. Some days the best me that I can be means I woke up and took a shower before falling back into bed and questioning why I exist. Some days I go to work and appear to be productive while actually accomplishing nothing and feeling as if whatever is left of my soul is bleeding out through my eyes. Owning a house, having a steady job, these aren't my life. They're facets of my life. If I didn't have them I would still be an adult, and every time I see my self in the mirror I wonder how the hell anybody could consider me "responsible". I didn't get the manual, I don't know if other people did or if they're just better at faking than I am. Sometimes people tell me that I'm so lucky and so together and doing so well and I wonder what the hell they're looking at, because it doesn't feel that way. It feels like a godsdamn roller coaster. Every single day I'm just a tiny teeter away from falling and breaking into a billion pieces, or taking a duck to the face, or having the greatest adventure I'll ever know. There is infinite possibility before you. Don't give up, and never let anybody say you're not doing it right... because they're not you. They haven't lived your life. You did. Every single day, one day at a time. You took the long way, and you're still here. You woke up today. Congratulations!
Raspberry Pi Wireless host
[post to come eventually]
- https://jenssegers.com/43/Realtek-RTL8188-based-access-point-on-Raspberry-Pi hostapd for my realtek wireless that doesn't support nl80211
- Custom hostapd doesn't seem to install as on-boot service correctly, had to force installation
# update-rc.d hostapd enable
update-rc.d: using dependency based boot sequencing
update-rc.d: error: no runlevel symlinks to modify, aborting!
# insserv -v -r hostapd
# insserv -v -d hostapd
- RTL8188 or my device or whatever doesn't support multiple bssids. So sad.
- Next step: openvpn routing link to main smrshnet
I finished 2014 by reading through all of Robert Jordan's Wheel of Time series (14 books in 2 months). This post is for a collection of things read this year. I plan to update it each chance I get.
Short Stories and Books
- Hello Moto by Nnedi Okorafor read 2015-01-02 recommended by jcamins
- Kabu Kabu by Nnedi Okorafor (collection of short stories) read 2015-01-02 to 2015-01-07 recommended by jcamins
- The Secret World Chronicles by Mercedes Lackey (Humble Bundle ed.) ISBN 9781939230140 finished 2015-01-13
- The God Engines by John Scalzi finished 2015-01-14
- Mogworld by Yahtzee Croshaw finished 2015-01-20
- Arcanum 101: Welcome New Students by Rosemary Edghill and Mercedes Lackey finished 2015-01-21
- Jumper by Steven Gould finished 2015-01-22
- Zombies vs. Unicorns edited by Justine Larbalestier and Holly Black finished 2015-01-28
- Bleeding Violet by Dia Reeves finished 2015-01-29
- Tithe by Holly Black finished 2015-01-30
- Dragonflight by Anne McCaffrey finished 2015-02-02
- Dragonquest by Anne McCaffrey finished 2015-02-03
- The White Dragon by Anne McCaffrey finished 2015-02-04
- Eastern Standard Tribe by Cory Doctorow finished 2015-02-05
- Dune by Frank Herbert finished 2015-02-10
- The State of the Art by Ian M. Banks finished 2015-02-18
- Descendant by Ian M. Banks finished 2015-02-19
- Use of Weapon by Ian M. Banks finished 2015-02-26
- Odd Attachment by Ian M. Banks finished 2015-02-26
Radio Plays and Audiobooks
- "Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Primary Phase" listened 2015-01-05
- "Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Secondary Phase" listened 2015-01-06
Lets pretend my day is a 24hr comic for a second...
06:40 Wake up late, scramble wildly for clothing, drive to a train and then
07:20 train ride
08:30 Welcome to New York! (rushing hordes of people headed to the subway)
09:35 This is odd, I'm still waiting for the bus. Oh well, I'll get there eventually
10:00 [Film missing]
11:50 (int: elevator, trolley with large shipping boxes) YAY! things to unpack!
12:30 Finally done unpacking... Time to work on switch configs like a boss!
12:35 NOPE! Time to go work on some useless UI issue that is a convenience problem!
13:45 Saved from UI issue by... zomgholyshit virus is eating the shared drives wtfbbq!!1
14:20 Killed it once...
15:20 Three times a virusssss... I loooooooooove youuuuuuu
14:45 Oh, now someone actually managed to get the fileserver to run it? Thats cool. I'll just connect and HERPDERP 100%CPU NOFIXLOL!
16:15 Finally killed the damn thing. Fuck that virus! Oh well... I might be able to write some configs at least
16:17 Oh, sure! I would love to go install that wireless access for you
16:20 We don't have any more WAPs!@? I guess I'll go through the junk pile and reprogram one.
17:10 *beep beep* "I'm in the car already!" *hurried packing and stumbling out the door*
18:23 on the train home (train was supposed to leave 10 minutes ago)
My day was
useful fulfilling calm "interesting".
How was yours?
Thing I learned today:
Duck typing is a cute name for the very powerful (and lazy) object typing method of not caring what you're handed and running your code on it anyway.
First pull request on someone else's project on github.
Books in progress:
CouchDB: The Complete Guide
Out to spin fire with the family!
In my last post I said I would post up the past WildFire audio recordings. Unbeknownst to all of you I DID! Why didn't anyone know? Because I totally forgot to post about it. In fact I neglected to post for so long that its nearly time for FALL WildFire.
Never fear though, prepare yourself for a MEGAPOST of _ALL_ the WildFire audio I have available! Thanks as always to the DJs for their amazing talents on and off the field.
Summer 2012 (links fixed Sep 14th)
- Friday - nope, we had recording problems. Sorry.
- Saturday - The Amazing Baz (Baz Simon)
- Sunday - DJ Recluse (Matt Weston)
- Perfomance Class (coming soon... I hope)
Another amazing weekend. More will go here later, but first the IMPORTANT stuff.
- Never Gonna Bop (extra long cut) Sunday night sampler fun! (also on soundcloud)
- Never Gonna Bop
The music is hosted on my personal server this time, so it'll be there for the forseeable future. I will be reposting older recordings as well.
Sometimes I make stupid analogies that make me laugh. Here's a recent example:
dracoling: let me put it this way
dracoling: it's like building a car out of blenders
dracoling: sure, I guess if you add enough duct tape and chop the blenders into the right shape you might be able to get it to pretend to be a car... sorta
dracoling: but it's never going to be a good car
This past weekend I took and passed the HAM Technician test, which has been a vague life goal for years now. I say vague because it kept fading out of site under other things I was doing. While I wait for my ID to get processed by the FCC I decided to dig up information on the radio tower at work.
It's actually pretty interesting from a radio nerd and history perspective.
First some pictures with a little info: http://deakworld.weebly.com/ham-radio-odds--sods.html
Then a thread with some more info on QRZ: http://forums.qrz.com/showthread.php?217251-Antenna-Discoveries-in-NY&p=1694077#post1694077
I am going to try to get permission this week to go exploring and take my own pictures... for science.
Playing music is fun, LadioCast is an awesome tool that lets you broadcast ANY audio from your soundcard to an icecast server. It also lets you mix from multiple sources. Being a simple tool it doesn't grab it's own metadata info or anything fancy like that. There are several common ways to update this info and they're covered other places online. Below I've included my own ladiocast_update script that adds a bit extra to the metadata mix.
Sometimes you want to play a stream for a bit and then drop offline cleanly, but you don't want to hang around to wait for it to finish (sleep is awesome once or twice a month).
Through the magic of AppleScript you can do this. [We can have platform debates later, my whole broadcast kit is in osx right now, get over it.]
This script queries iTunes for the current state (playing, paused, stopped). If the stream is seen playing or paused it updates the metadata in ladiocast with the info from the currently playing track. If it finds that it has stopped it plays the "radio off" playlist (used to give a sign-off message), waits a little bit (for the message to finish) and then kills the stream.